Sunday, December 19, 2010


What a long night.
I'm running on four cups of black cinnamon infused coffee and three Saltine crackers..
I've had approximately one hour of sleep total in the last 24hrs.
My daughter has been throwing up the whole of the night and has horrible diarrhea. I had nothing but Gingerale to give her, no money and even limited gas in the car, I had no idea what to do. Its awful to have your child so sick and you're unable to make it better.
 My husband finally got off of work at 11pm last night and came home with Pedialyte and Imodium Ad. I was able to finally calm her down and continue to care for her.
My husband retreated to the next room to watch the basketball highlights with a bottle of Brandy while I played nurse the rest of the night.
I also was back and forth in the bathroom, I upped my lax dosage and it did the trick.
Weight 110lbs..
I won't update the ticker yet, I know this weight may be short lived, it is after all in part to the lax, and that is nothing but water weight mostly. I don't really care, I feel loads lighter-no pun intended.
Finally I feel clean, which is what I really needed. I've been drinking water all night long after every trip, not getting dehydrated again!
I'm so tired.
The vomiting has ceased for now, the diarrhea is still present and now hints of a fever are in the works. I made my husband get up and get more supplies just in case today turns out to be a repeat. This time I'm prepared.

I've just mopped my house with bleach to get all the puke smell out, I can't smell it but I'm sure its present. The sight and smell of vomit mean nothing to me now, as a matter of fact my daughter threw up on me and I didn't even flinch. Mia has desensitised me alright.
My daughter is exhausted herself, I really hope she gets better today.
I've eaten crackers only, I'm craving potatoes and bananas, maybe potassium low?
The weather outside is nice, chilly but not so much that I can't have my windows open. The black strong coffee has given me enough energy to both clean the house and shower. I no longer smell of vomit, for now..
To binge or not?
I want to make Spaghetti and Brownies, that's what I really want to binge on. I have no money to do so unfortunately, makes me mad. I'm stressed and will be alone again. I'm not even putting up a fight today. I just wish something would change already. Everything else in my life is on hold, I'm at a standstill, at least I didn't have that always with my weight. Now I can't say that anymore, the one thing I could change hasn't anymore. Its frustrating and discouraging. I'm trying everything I can think of?
My afternoon will consist of more coffee, the Sunday paper and Mia. If I'm not too wiped out I'll try to workout. My daughter is knocked out and I'm hoping it will stay that way. I hope I won't spend another night in worry.
Thank you all for the lovely comments and concern, I really appreciate it. Its nice to not feel so alone sometimes..
I hope you are all having a better Sunday than me.
Oh, by the way I noticed today the effects of taking Sea Kelp; my hair isn't falling out as much and my nails are getting longer. Just thought I'd share this.


SM said...

You are so strong.
I really admire you.


Charlie said...

I can't imagine how rough last night must have been.
Like SM said, you are incredibly, amazingly strong.


Dylphe said...

i hope she feels better real soon so you can relax, also mentally. i'm glad the laxies made the change in your weight you were hoping for even if it's temporary but since you're saying it's been a while. i'm getting me some tomorrow the drops they gave me don't do shiznit.
stay strong

Weightoomuch said...

I hope your daughter gets better. I understand staying up with a child and feeling helpless. You just want them to stop having to puke so they can sleep and feel better.
I'm glad to hear about your loss. I hope you keep it up. Im sure you can :) good luck and much love.

All.That.Wander.Are.Not.Lost said...

aw I hope your daughter gets to feeling better soon:(-you really are amazing for being able to take such good care of her, clean, AND running basically on coffee alone.

I'm gonna have to get some of the Sea Kelp, my hair has been falling out loads more recently!

starvingartist said...

I really hope it's just a bug and not the flu or anything. I really hope she gets well soon.

I'm sure it won't be like this for you your whole life. Hang in there and you'll be fine.

HELP I'M POOR!! Follow this new installation of my life. Although, I will be back; here i...