Thursday, June 16, 2011

Walk two miles in my shoes..

                                                                                                                                 Mood:Anxious

So this morning we are out of milk at the house, I wake up and walk 2miles to Publix to rack up.
Follow me along my walk friends..
We may even call this a tour perhaps?

I love Graffiti, I have a strange fascination for all tagged things..
Mexican restaurant with Food to die for..
Bike Shop
Beautiful tags
Barber Shop and Bar, never cut your hair here, Barbers may be tipsy!
OMGOMGOMG!! MECCA; I loves Thriftstores!
Restaurant in Shape of Castle
Firemen..Miami has the sexiest Heroes, I've never wanted to be a Pyromaniac so badly!
This is the Bakery where the Hott Firemen frequent, oh yes they have a playground *GROWLS*
Adult DayCare Center
Why are Shoe Repair stores always little tiny places?
8 Street is lined with Roosters like this that were donated by a local Artist
Doggy Daycare
Best Baguettes
Beautiful Artwork line our Expressways
I've arrived at the Market
I wish I was a Baker..
Grr I wish I could binge on all of this nonsense
lol a tiny section devoted to UK goodies..see any familiars?
*sighs*
SummerCamp where my Daughter should be *heavy sigh, eyes get glossy*
Lil stray kitten
Pigeon with broken Wing
More tagged Beauty
Gallery Art

Fat Girl Walking
Beautiful Architecture going to waste as an overpriced Apartment Complex
No Guard Dogs, we have Roosters as Pets here in Miami
I have no Idea..looks like a crazy Onion Hoarder

So thats it, I'm home now and starting my battle with resisting Mia.
112.4lbs today.
My sister is coming down Friday, she's rented a room on the beach for the weekend, at least I can do that with her. I can't go back with her on the return trip, oh well.
I've been chatting with my friend who is dying to take me on a date when I do go to Orlando, he's even offered to pay for my ticket, I can't ask him though or can I?
I made a comment yesterday about my Sailor Moon obsession, and this boy wanted to buy me the DVD series set which I really really want but have no idea where to get it..he said he would buy it for me as a present!
Is that crazy that he wants to buy me something, he's also 8rs younger than me..
Oh man, am I a Cougar or Mountain Lion now, or Jackal, what's the lingo for dating the younger guy?
He likes me A LOT...
As for my Happy Tuesday friend, grrr not only is he distant, but I hate his mixed messages.
He texts me last night at 2:30am and then asks me the same repetitive questions, when I started talking dirty to him (because thats what 2am conversations are suppose to be about!) he shoots me down and gets boring, then quiet, omfg!!!
I am getting bored of him a little, he is not meeting me 90/10 and I'm not a  fuckin clown here to entertain you dammit, if you like me swing those balls and act like it!
I ended our convo and I think I'm gonna ignore him today, maybe the car breaking down and this little break is a good thing. I wish he would act like he cared more, I know he's a Virgo and they don't change or aren't all squishy and stuff but my God C'mon!
And here I am thinking weight would be my only problem..
Happy Thursday all, gonna find something to do and get Mia off my back.
I haven't taken the pill yet, gonna start it again on Monday. I will tell Dr. about the voices when I go see him on the 28th, I'm scared though because Schizophrenia runs in my Family, do you think he might try to lock me away or something, am I going crazy here?
I just don't want anyone to think I'm an unfit parent because of the Mental Illness..
It never ends does it.

Oh and today my kidneys hurt really bad...

Good luck everybody and stay strong..

5 comments:

Claire said...

What a lovely tour! :) thank you.
If he offered to pay why not? unless he's manipulative and will expect more than you want to give in return I say have fun!
My family has a history of schizophrenia too... but they never mentioned any of that when I got help. I just put it forward as an 'I'm confused' thing. Just started with I'm of two minds about X, one voice says X one says X etc. They won't lock you away, you're a great mum! They'll just help you and talk to you and give you meds.
Keep up the water~! Hope you feel better soon xxx

Jenn said...

#1 you SHOULD get a job at a bakery!!!
#2 I don't love tagging, but I'm SO glad you enjoy where you live :-)
#3 firemen ARE so hot I swear
#4 let the boy buy you stuff
#5 let the boy pay for ticket
#7 you're a cougar HAHA
#8 don't worry about getting locked up or being crazy. I would be a LITTLE honest about hearing voices. I mean, LOTS of people get intrusive thoughts and its kind of the same thing. I used to hear voices when I was a kid and my kid is saying he's hearing them and I worry for him but I just relate to him so he knows it's "normal" even though I'm not really sure it is normal. I explained to him that when our brains are growing, nerves fire and do test runs and it's ok...
sorry about your kidney's :-(
go easy on the protein shakes and drink more water maybe.

xo

Peridot (G+P) said...

MOAR BIKE SHOP PICS!!! RAWRRRRRR!!!!

Lol, thank you for the tour, you live in a really cool looking place! :D

Lol, you're a MILF! Get used to it :3 Also: Yes, Cougar is the correct term. Mmrowr!

Thank you both for the hugs :) How are the summer holidays going without the summer camp option? Lol, when you gt a job and can boot out ball'n'chain at least you know shit will be organised on time! XD

My current skin for Minecraft is Sailor Mars. I love her and Sailor Saturn :D

They will only lock you up if you lose all touch with reality and go totally mental, you'll be in to keep you safe and get you sane again. DEFINITELY tell them about the voices while you can still recognize them as being distinct from your own personality. ESPECIALLY since you have a family history of schizophrenia!

Have a wonderful weekend, stay safe and keep yourself well hydrated. Try nomming some safe fruits if you can. Watermelon is fan-fucking-tastic on hot days and I can only dream of the quality of pineapples you'd have access to in such warm climes!

Love you <3

Dani said...

sorry that ur kindeys hurt hun drink lots o fwater tahts what i do when mine hurt
and i liked the picutres thanx for sahring
idt the doc will lock u up a n dur not an unfit mother

Mich said...

I got the full series of Sailor Moon off ebay. It's region-free, so it won't play on older dvd players, but it was only like $65 (and considering it's every single episode, I figured not that bad).

Drink lots of fluids for your kidneys. Hope they feel better. <3

I usually have to run past the English/Irish food section in the supermarkets here. If I look too long, it's like MMMMMMmmm Twirls and Buttons and Dairy Milk and Aero and Kimberly cookies and Club Orange OMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM and then I can't stop....

You are a very fit mother. I can tell that just from reading your blog. And there are plenty of unfit parents out there who don't necessarily have any mental illness....
I figure if you're worried about being a good or bad mother, then you're conscious of every parenting decision you make, which means you're trying very hard to be a good mommy, and so you ARE a good mommy.

If you're not feelin it with your Happy Tuesday friend, maybe you're right and it's time to cut him loose! Go for the younger guy! :D

They can't lock you away unless you become a danger to society. And that's like extreme danger to society--like killing people. I've looked it up repeatedly just to make sure, because I'm always scared of being locked away...
So yeah I think we're safe.

Hope you have a good weekend, my luv!!

xoxo

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