Thursday, March 10, 2016

Is it Moldy in here or is it just me?

I woke up at 3:30 this morning and could not go back to sleep.
I could hear the entire neighborhood as it awoke.
There was the occasional car near my building starting up, a garbage truck, school busses zipping by and of course as it neared 6am, I hear the strange woman and her kids who sit outside on my stoop every morning. This stranger and her kids just plop themselves on the steps outside and wait on a school bus., afterwards she leaves. I wish she would say good morning or hello or even nod her head and acknowledge me as I walk out and head to work every morning. She doesn't and I just find the whole thing odd, I mean she's like less than five feet away from my apartment door.
Well you would think that I would arrive on time to work today seeing as how I hardly slept but no. I got to work late again.
I've been arriving to work late this week and all of last. No one says anything to me and that's a relief.
Today is the loooooooong day aka Wednesday. I fucking detest Wednesday like you couldn't imagine.
Once upon a time when I was a manager at a KFC, I would have to open the store every morning, and in such I would sit on the bed and cry, or cry in the shower. I hated my job so much.
Well years later and we have weeping Wednesday.
It wouldn't be so bad if there were other people working too, but it's just Dragon and I for 13 hours straight.
As a matter of fact both of our registers have been taking turns breaking down, it's all on account of this whole new "Chip Reader" bullshit that was created. What a stupid waste of time. I don't know if all of you have that where yall's stay at but in Florida we do. It takes about 3 minutes for each transaction. It is super long, and that's not counting the extra time added by my stupid patients who can't follow directions.
Once you insert your Debit/Credit card "chip" first into the machine it tells you in Caps lock "PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE."
Of course they take the card out which just freezes the register and well we could be here all day.
Most of the time I have to push the card in all the way because this new monetary system is designed by dumbasses.
Oh my God don't even get me started on how awkward it is to tell people to "put it in down there, stick it in, push it in a little further."
I feel like a porn star at work. I have my regulars and I know who I can joke around with, especially my male patients, so on more than one occasion when the card reader isn't registering I say "Here let me just put that in there, or honey it's not the first time I have to show a man where it goes."
My patients love me.
I'm not everyone's cup of tea and if not fuck you, I taste great!
Anyways, back to whatever the heck I was trying to say here, oh yea, the registers keep breaking down.
One of the highlights of my day today was (and this is sad) when the repair Men came by and actually fixed one of the ancient registers. The other one is hopeless for now, they will try again tomorrow with that hunk of junk.
To have other people to converse with that's not Dragon is divine, that's probably why I give such excellent customer service, chatting with my patients is the norm. Majority of the time I converse with them so much and already know most of them by name and even their birthdays.

You have no idea how efficient she and I are working together, she is my work husband.
We don't even have to talk, we can say so much with eye rolling at idiotic patients, sighing heavily and my favorite getting everything done in such a quick fashion there is not one person who doesn't say "Wow you girls are fast."
If you're going to wait for your prescription to be ready after you've dropped it off the supposed wait time is 10 minutes, we do it in five.
We're just that good.
So today there is no escape which is the worst part. I can't go home until it's 9pm.
You have no idea how aware of time I am.
There are rushes at work, it feels like hours have gone by and so much is done, then I'll check the clock and only ten minutes have elapsed.
Dragon is very sick. I should actually start calling her something else because she's not such a bitch anymore, she's actually a very decent person.
I think I'll just call her my boss.
She does accommodate whatever schedule I need, she doesn't give me orders or rides my ass anymore like before, I think time has changed us both, seeing as we met each other in our very first year at the Pharmacy.
Well it's her turn to be sick, everyone at my workplace is sick, we all have the same symptoms.
I had three customers tell me today that our store smells damp and moldy even.
Are we all just sick from this neglected work environment?
Everything is old and broken down at our store. The employee bathroom is broken, there is no top on the toilet so in order to flush it you have to stick your hands in the back of the toilet and lift whatever mechanisms make it flush, this is month three of the broken toilet. They do not fix things at work.
The other bathroom Is the "Customer" bathroom although we spend the majority of time telling people it's broken or that we have none, is gross.
Today I totally forgot to pee, at some point on hour eight of my shift I decided to take my lab coat off and make myself pee, or at least sit down. I stand for 13hrs straight on Wednesdays.
When I went to the bathroom the seat was full of piss and pubes, of course.
Our store is gross and maybe we're sick from Mold or asbestos even?
I put the humidifier we store used for boss lady so she could breathe better, she is always sneezing, like every 10 minutes. Even before this cold she's always sneezing.
I say bless you after every sneeze, matter of fact I've said bless you so much I'm practically an ordained priest.
Between her sneezing and the constant frenzy of the day we finally hit the less that five hour mark (my favorite) before we close. This is such a relief because soon I get to go home.
Around this time of day also my chest started aching real bad, I was so scared I almost mentioned it to her, almost. I just don't know how to confide in anyone else, especially about my ED. I don't want anyone to look at me the way I do. The way I feel deep down inside. Like the trash I am. I am trash folks, if I had any courage at all I would finally just slit my throat once and for all.
I respect her too much to even burden her with my problems.
I want her to still smile at me and consider me responsible, but sometimes I'm scared and I panic and I have no one at work to talk me down from the ledge, so I keep the freak out inside and tell myself well if anything happens, at least someone will call the Rescue quick enough.

I have had nothing to eat today. There was just no time.

Well just wanted to write for writings sake. I know I've lost a lot of followers and probably no one even reads this blog anymore, so instead I write this for me, my own diary, my personal feelings at the time.
I'm talking into a void but many of us are.
Goodnight and Goodbye.


hilo said...

Hello, just wanted you to know you still have at least one reader. Your ordained minister comment made me laugh out loud. It's funny/strange how different our internal lives can be from our external ones. Anyways, just wanted you to know there a few entities floating around in the void. :) I follow you on Instagram as well, I'm hi_lo__ :)

Jenn said...

Hi Babe. All my love.
you probably ARE sick from the filth at work!
take care <3

JohnDoe said...

Always entertaining to read you ;-) take care and hang in there

JohnDoe said...
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