Tuesday, February 19, 2013

still here


1 comment:

Peridot (G+P) said...

I'm so glad you're still here. I've been desperately hoping that you were just busy and not dead.

*Clings to your leg like a monkey*

He is willing to work through the aftermath of a fight and endure stress-fuelled drama? WIN.

Awww, nice timing! I understand the deep fryer. I really really want a toastie pie maker ^.^;

Congrats on 10 months :D

Man it sucks that you guys got sick :( *Hugs* There is something going around here too. Take care of yourself, ok?

Grrrrrrrrrrr. I wish your Ex would just grow the fuck up already.

So your BF eats like a normal person and you are shown it it safe and encouraged to try it? It's a good thing for getting to a place where you can be awesome 24/7.

Dafuck? I thought you had LOST weight!

Ed is an abusive fuck like your Ex. Fully abusive relationship.

Meds can be tricky, you have to find a balance that works. I really wish there was an easy test to find out what would work best with each person's brain. I hate my meds because they make me fuzzy-headed but I would be so much worse without them.

I'm always here for you no matter what, just want you to know. Sometimes I isolate and vanish and get mopey and useless but I still love you.

You've achieved so much, but the sadness won't let you see it right now. So, what I see: You left a relationship and living situation that was really abusive and bad and you have a job and customers who think you are awesome and discovered a guy who does random awesome things and you are raising an amazing wee human being and you're writing a really cool book that DAMMIT I WANT A SIGNED COPY OF.

Getting better and being well is fucking tough and it's different for everyone. It takes time and energy. Some people have the luxury of support and that boost towards life and others don't.

If something is unhealthy and makes you worse it isn't a good thing to keep around.

Honestly, for me I'd rather bald truth than a pleasant lie any day. I'm going to worry about you whether you like it or not. All I want to ask is just honest so my imagination doesn't run wild with images of you staging a coup at work and locking AssStick in a cupboard or lying dead on the floor of your kitchen or leading a Mardi Gras parade riding an elephant dressed as Galadriel. (Yes, I honestly considered each of those as options for What Lou Is Up To)

I want to hear from you even if it is just "Work was busy. I'm exhausted. Going to lie in bed with cats" or "BF is here, sexytimes soon, be jealous ;)" Coz even though I don't comment much and I can't afford to post things often I do love you.

<3

Begin

 Tomorrow is my first day back at work. It's only for four hours but after almost one complete year of rest and self isolation, I'm ...