Hi there

So...
Yes I know it's been a long time since I've last blogged, actually writing. Sorry about that.
Well let's see what's all been happening with me lately.

I've been working some, it's gradually slowing down. If I had an actual bar graph you all could see how Lou stock is plummeting.
The car has been okay, I mean other than the last time it drained more of my savings away.
I've actually been so broke I've had to ask my ex's mechanic to give me back the 60$ I gave him to fix my back tail light which by the way he hadn't fixed yet, something about not finding the part in the junkyard, possibly having to order it aka buy it NEW from the dealership.
Please.
So I told him look sorry but I've changed my mind about the repair, I need the money more than the luxury of having a brake light that works.
He complied of course but never bringing me the money himself, instead solely depending on my ex to deliver the money.
I was skeptical I would ever see the money again but my ex actually came through for once and didn't make shit harder than it sometimes is.

I got to have a date with my boyfriend last Wednesday which was nice, we went to see the new Godzilla movie which was very decent.
Our date took a sour note when I couldn't read the GPS right and we sort of got lost and walked lots of blocks in the opposite direction for about 15 minutes.
We finally made it to the regal Cinema on Lincoln Road near my job on the beach, with about 10 or less minutes close to show time.
Once inside the confines of the cold dark theater we were golden.
Afterward I suggested to my boyfriend we head over to eat somewhere.
Eat.
I was good but a date isn't really a date without a meal afterward so that's what we did.
I decided to take him to this old pizza joint I used to haunt back during my club kid days.
We ordered a huge pizza and even dessert in the way of Elephant ears.
I was actually eating up until that full feeling came on.
By the time we were done and I was in the car driving home, the food started to rise in the back of my throat and I knew for certain the minute I got home I would be purging everything.

Purging has been curbed a lot, I would say I've cut it back to maybe twice a week three if I'm doing especially bad.
I've been eating less that's true but in my defense I mostly keep it down.
I'm really tired of Bulimia, god am I so tired.
I've been working out a bit more which helps with me being okay eating cause then I could just burn most of it away.
Laxatives unfortunately are still being abused. I have a hard time quitting those cold turkey just yet.

I'm so tired all the time, my Insomnia is bad, most nights when I'm not drunk, I sleep only 3 hours a night.
Insomnia, no food, full of laxatives, I don't know how I'm still standing.

I usually suffer from a stress rash but this week it's more of an all over rash.
I don't know what to do or why has this come on.
Nobody else here seems to be afflicted by this but me?
I don't know what's going on with this Judas body of mines.

My daughter is okay, she actually passed the 3rd grade!
I was thinking the worst, maybe summer school or even her repeating the grade but no she's good.
I know my ex has not been sending her to school most days when he has her, I've had a talk with him already about that.
I hate that she goes with him every week and there's no way to know just how irresponsible he will be or what all will happen when she's out of my care.

Summer is upon us and that means no more school for her.
I've discussed with my sister about my daughter leaving for the summer with her to Orlando.
It's all set for next Sunday except that I haven't told my ex yet and I don't know how he'll take it but there's no other choice here, at least not for me.
I don't have a sitter for her and the truth is I really need to work more.
I need to network more and go to other pharmacies that could possibly need a night shift or afternoon shift filled. I'm just the pharmacy technician for that.
My job is not a steady thing right now, I don't have a set schedule which is nice I'll admit because I can come and go as I please but it's also not the best when it comes to having enough when its time to pay the bills.
With my daughter gone for the summer I can focus more on working.

Yesterday my Work husband Big Gay Al called me.
It was Thursday and I originally had the day off, My old pharmacist New Mommy Central sends me a text asking can I possibly do 4 hours at my Home store.
I agreed because well it's been slow... FOUR HOURS!
I got to work with the Country Pam who is okay.
Work was great, I got a lot done and even helped out some Older Man to the best of my ability.
He was so grateful he actually pulled a manager aside to let him know just how well I helped him.
He said he would call corporate and put in a good word for me hoping that I would somehow get rewarded.
He was very sweet and it was my pleasure to help him with whatever he needed, I only wished I could do more.
Sometimes we get so busy and behind in the pharmacy our customer service can falter, but in those moments when you can make the time, you do make a difference.
I get a call from Big Gay Al and I already know what he wants..
When I call him back after my shift is over he tells me the New Pharmacy he works at is hiring.
Right now they don't need a technician yet, in a few more months after they have done all the remodeling and expansion of the store they will, in the meantime they need cashiers and someone to manage the Front of the store.
He's recommended me and says I am a "Happy, dependable, lovely helpful person."
He'd like for me to go see the new store tomorrow Saturday, and just have a talk with the Manager and see what all they need and possibly if that could suit me, a little more hours and work.

I called my kids godmother who is the lovely soul who has given me a shot at life again via employment and ask her for advice.
See the thing is, it's a conflict of interest to work at another Pharmacy,
to which she responds "What they don't know won't hurt them."
Having her blessing gives me slight hope that a second job may be possibly in the future works.

I recently got a letter from the IRS saying I was owed monies from 2010 taxes or some nonsense.
998$ to be exact.
Seems exciting but frankly I'm unshakeable until I see it for myself.
Well people don't get excited because my ex calls me Wednesday after dropping my daughter off to say he got a check in the mail with both our names for that amount...You see!
So we've split it down the middle, I got 500$ to put back into my savings.
Something better than nothing I guess.
I admit I got excited over the possibility of possibly almost 1000$ all to myself. My sister was uber happy even asking me to give her 100$
Sorry sis.


Today I worked at that other store on the beach.
I've worked there on Wednesday too with that male pharmacist who we'll loving call Mr. Anal cos he is.
Mr.Anal and I get along okay, he actually told me I did a great job right before I went home.
Things with him went rather smoothly until an old hag came to Drop off...
It was none other than Terminal cancer Cunt who I had horrible problems with once who gave me such a hard time, so much so I had horrible thoughts towards.
Well, she was back and equally as rude, she started going on and on about this and that. When I couldn't help her because she was so fucking vague in what she wanted she begins to insult my intelligence.
I turn To Mr. Anal and tell him to deal with her because I refused.
He did and incurred her wrath but he's used to it.

Today Friday, I worked that same store again.

The mornings of floating on the beach when my daughter is here is hectic. I have to both get she and I ready in the span of an hour.
It's not easy. We get to school a little after 8:15, the stupid dog makes me later.
Yes I said DOG.
Well a puppy actually.
There's a large Mutt puppy who is a stray and is starving.
I recently tried to shave a couple of bucks and buy my cats CAT CAFE instead of ALLEY CAT brand cat food.
The cat's hated the change, so much they refused to eat it, so I'm left with a whole bag of useless cat food.
I have an outdoor stray cat(s) I already feed, but it's way too much food, so I decided to share some with the stray dog I see as well.
In the morning already running behind schedule, after walking my daughter to class, I share most of the food with him. This poor dog is so hungry he is salivating over the pile of calico colored X's and O's...
Afterwards I drive as quickly as possible to work.
I'm super anxious all the drive there.
It's hot out plus the morning commute bumper to bumper traffic..
A text from New Mommy Central distracts me. She's telling me what a good job I've done with the customer from Wednesday, he did indeed call corporate to song my praises.
The good new settles me down some.
 I'm especially cranky because I've not slept, only four hours this time.
As if that wasn't enough, I've mistaken my pay this week and it's less.
I have enough for rent and to pay my DSL. The rest has to last until the next payday which isn't much. I'm looking on surviving with about 80$

It was very busy today at work, but nothing I couldn't handle, an overall great day despite one customer that rubbed me the wrong way.
This old cunt.
 The phone kept ringing and I had a dead tone at the end.
This Old cunt comes along complaining to my pharmacist Dementia.
She's upset someone keeps hanging up on her, my pharmacist lets the cunt know that it's her phone that has the bad connection.
The Cunt continues her tirade and even says she will report the "'person" responsible.
When it's time to fill her meds I go ahead and ring her up. This old Cunt looks me straight in the eye and says "Why did you hang up on me?"
To which I responded Lady I've never seen you a day in my life!
I also tell her when she kept insisting that I wasn't going to hear it a second more, I told her to stop it and Lord she did.
I think she wasn't expecting that response from me, she hadn't rehearsed the What if they're not intimidated speech...
Anyways the day was okay after that.

I've had customers give me Candy for the past two days, one man today giving me Coffee flavored candies (bless his heart) and another women fresh from her hometown visit to Munich giving me Chocolates from a shop there.
Both sweets I plan on sharing with my boyfriend.

I'm a bit itchy and somber from all these bills and being broke, but what can you do. I'm two pounds less than yesterday and still here.
My life is what it is.

I hope you all are well.
We'll talk again soon.
Goodnight.