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Saturday, August 10, 2013

Super Lou to the Rescue!!

Okay first off want to Welcome Leo to Blogger!
Let's show support to my lil Sis and her new Blog "Life's Curve Balls""
I hope its a huge success to her and she can find as many amazing people as I have been blessed to know. I love you all, in the four years of being on Blogger I have met so many wonderful souls, I feel unworthy. You all have made such huge impressions on me with your stories and your friendships, I wouldn't be so strong without any of you. You guys have never abandoned me or left me for a single second unlike so many others who have sworn their loyalty to me and my friendship.
Ever since I came out with my story you all have stuck by me...THANK YOU for that.
I know what true loyalty is thanks to you.
I hope to keep growing on here and being able to impact you as much as you have to me.

Secondly I am posting today's Vlog plus one of my first Vlogs with the Turtle saving story lol.
I haven't watched this Vlog since I first uploaded it.
Let me tell you that it makes me both happy and oh so very SAD.
Happy because I have come a long way and sad because I was so so sick with Anorexia.
I can recall being that sick and being so alone, no one really cared enough to tell me to stop, I had the opposite, I had too much encouragement to keep going or "be strong."

I've grown since then because as much as I wanted that too, I've cut a lot of people out of my life. I still don't know how they are doing with their own struggles, but for me to still be alive today it was necessary.

I come first, even on most days when I really feel otherwise.
I'm very sad now, because in my deepest heart of hearts, God forgive me, I want to weigh 80lbs again.
Am I a bad person for wanting this?

I feel like I am.
I'm shit.
I'm so blessed, why can't I see that?

To all the readers, hang in there with me, I'm not perfect.
I'm trying.
I'll share my failures, and my little triumphs.

Thank You for reading.


So here's the link to my bestie's blog : http://carlight0801.blogspot.com/

 

2 comments:

Peridot (G+P) said...

Since I haven't heard from you in forever I figure I'm probably one of the people you've cut out of your life. I'd honestly rather have you alive and not in contact than in contact and slowly dying. (That and depression is really fucking BORING to read about all the sodding time. I'm amazed you read as long as you did!)

Yay for saving the possum! Damn, it feels weird to be saying that. They're doing so much damage here my normal reaction is KILLTHEFUZZYLITTLEBASTARD!!!1! 0.0;

FUCKING HELL your parking is expensive! Having a pet dragon would be cheaper. (Maybe fly The Hungarian Horntail Pharmacist to work?)

Best of luck with the clothes shopping. I hope you find some nice stuff that you can afford and that it doesn't trigger you too badly.

I've got a package here I've been meaning to send you since before you moved house, and now we've got things sorted out here I can FINALLY afford to send it. I think I've got your postal address, the "SW (16/2)Charlie Tumbleweed" one, right? I'll post it on over this Wednesday. I don't think a knitted toy for Miss B would fit in the space remaining in the box, so I'll find her something Kiwiana-related that doesn't make noise instead. (No buzzy bee toys. Unless it is to be kept at your Ex's :3 Muahahaha!)

Take care of yourself and stay awesome, ok? Arohanui <3

lou said...

To my peridot, you are never one I will ever cut out, one day I will make the journey over there and say Arohanui in person :)